Marriage And Happiness: Will Marriage Make You Happy?

What's the scoop on marriage and happiness? Will marriage make you happy? Or will it make you unhappy?
Despite our fascination with weddings, roughly half of those who make it to the alter end up in divorce court . . . and divorce is a messy business that ill-affects children and casts a long shadow on the future. It is costly in terms of money, stress and emotions. So, ever wonder what the latest research says about marriage? Will it make you happy?
Or could it contribute to your unhappiness, misery and discontent?
Research Findings
Here's the good news on marriage and happiness. A positive relationship between marriage and happiness has been reported in the research for many years. Several large surveys show generally how much happier married people are than those who are unmarried. Married people report greater happiness than those who have never been married, and those who are divorced, widowed or separated.
But it's not just saying the vows that does the trick. Studies show that people who live with a partner are also happier than those who live alone. Both married men and married women are happier than unmarried individuals, but some studies suggest that marriage may confer slightly greater benefits on men than women.
And . . .
Marriage tends to:
-- make people consistently happy
-- help them to experience positive emotions and find deep levels of life satisfaction
-- Marriage may protect people against life's hardships by offering support and friendship from the spouse, who can serve as a friend and confidant
-- A spouse can serve as a valued and trusted decision making partner, lowering a person's stress level
People who live alone may feel the brunt of life's hardships, whereas married folks benefit from the kind of close, strong support a partner can afford.
To better understand the relationship between marriage and happiness, let's take a look at life satisfaction. Happily married people report greater levels of life satisfaction than others, and marriage can really boost a person's happiness or sense of subjective well being.
Joy, a sense of belonging and inner peace may flow from a happy marriage. When a marriage is really good, the benefits may be even greater, including a sense of euphoria with life or a real sense of ecstacy.
Of course, the problem is having a really good marriage! Maybe the question should be, Will a good marriage make you happy? A truly exceptional marriage will go a long way toward helping you gain true and lasting happiness.
Happy Individuals
Naturally, happy people tend to make the best possible mates or spouses, and they create the happiest marriages. Research indicates happy people may have the best chance of getting married, too.
Keep in mind, happiness, like depression, is contagious. Being around unhappy people will make most people less happy, whereas happy friends tend to lift us up!
Unfortunately, not many people know how to manage a marriage and get the most out of it. The art of building a happy marriage can be elusive . . .
And most married people could use some training in the area of making their marriages better. Or in responding favorably to their spouses. Especially important is learning how to respond to your mate when things are not going well.
As the facts demonstrate, a good marriage is worth the effort. Since marriage is important, and it can make you happy, I've added a list of powerful but simple tips you can use to improve your marriage.
Even if you have a good marriage, these tips can make your relationship more satisfying and enjoyable.
Happy Marriage Tips: A Baker's Dozen
1. Look on the bright side -- always try to be as positive and optimistic as you can be. A spouse's positive attitude leads to positive behaviors and a more satisfying relationship. Marriage and happiness will go hand-in-hand for you.
2. Talk often and be honest with your spouse -- don't play communication games.
3. If you think of yourself as being superior to your spouse, better get some help for your marriage. A perceived sense of superiority can trash a relationship fast!
4. Take time to have fun and be kids again -- remain youthful and avoid taking yourselves too seriously!
5. If you have an argument or melt-down, repair the problem quickly -- be quick to understand, forgive and forget.
6. Be responsible for your own happiness and avoid blaming your spouse for your problems or unhappiness.
7. Learn to respond effectively to your spouse when you feel he/she is making you unhappy or upset. Avoid responses that will worsen the situation.
8. Give big problems or serious issues time to heal.
9. Each spouse should give the other plenty of support and encouragement to be all he or she can be in life . . . support, suport, support!
10. Each spouse should receive input and accept influence form the other. Stay clear of arrangements whereby one spouse influences the other, but it does not go both ways.
11. Marriages that distribute power evenly among both spouses are often happiest, as both spouses feel equally important and vital to the marriage, and no one feels inferior, less important, or left out.
And toxic resentment won't build up.
12. Avoid forcing changes upon your partner. Offer support and inspiration, but trust him/her to make needed changes. Don't nag or pressure your spouse, and watch your marriage and happiness grow together!
13. Put your best foot forward -- remember to strive to be your best every single day. Make sure you don't stop being polite and sensitive just because you got married. Don't stop listening. Don't start being a slob or acting like a lazy bum! Treat your spouse like the special person he/she really is . . . and don't stop, ever!
Try these tips and you'll enhance your chances of making your marriage a happy one -- one that fills you both with contentment and helps you to reach your personal goals, yielding great happiness and joy for both partners.
Marriage and Happiness: The Bottom Line
Will marriage make you happy? Despite the complications, yes, it can certainly help . . .
especially if you can follow simple but effective steps to make your marriage the best it can be.
If your marriage or romantic relationship is in trouble or facing significant problems, you may need to get professional help. Your marriage is worth it. Don't forget that marriage and happiness are two peas in a pod, so take good care of your marriage.
Remember: by learning how to respond to your partner wisely and effectively, you will change your entire life and revitalize your most precious relationship. Get more information on marriage and happiness, and our relationship coaching services here. Research on marital communication helps us predict whether a marriage will succeed or not. Marriages headed for failure tend to have plenty of red flags. They relate to bad habits that spouses have learned -- habits which are often difficult to break, even when people want to learn better ways of coping.
Traditional marital counseling often fails because it focuses on helping people to fight fairly or to keep the fights to a minimum. What works better is helping couples learn how to behave like other successful couples. In other words, the focus should be on learning success-oriented skill sets and good habits . . .
good, effective habits that will help you to easily and painlessly get the most of your marriage.
When both spouses are highly skilled at relationships, and each is working on improving himself/herself, both the marriage and happiness level will flourish.

2013

Wishing you good health, happiness, and success in the coming year and always .May joy, peace, and harmony be yours throughout the year ahead. Have a blissful New Year

What Is Your Core Strategy For 2013

Why You Should Wake-up Earlier

I read an amazing article on why you should get up earlier. As you know, the first hours of the day are crucial to the rest of your day. Not just the first hours.. actually i’d like to say the first 10 minutes will make up how the rest of your day will go. Wake-up with a positive mind-set and your day will amazingly..full of happiness and peacefulness. Wake-up with negative thoughts and you will miss opportunities in front of you, lose your temper and you know the rest.
The most successful people know how to leverage those early hours to accomplish more. Studies have shown that early risers are more likely to be optimistic, have better performance, greater career success and higher wages.

Here are the morning routines of 10 successful people that I hope will inspire you:
1. Anna Wintour, editor-in-chief, Vogue
The infamous fashion editor wakes up every day pre-dawn to get her adrenaline pumping. At 6:45 a.m., she’s already played an hour of tennis, then it’s off to have her hair styled into her signature bob. She’s in the office by 9 a.m.

2. David Karp, founder, Tumblr
At 25 years old, Karp is the founder and CEO of Tumblr, a growing microblogging platform that has reached over 26.9 million users. As demanding as his schedule is, Karp makes sure he doesn’t check his email until he gets in the office around 9:30 a.m. As quoted in Inc. Magazine, “Reading e-mails at home never feels good or productive . If something urgently needs my attention, someone will call or text me.”

3. Tony Robbins, self-help writer and motivational speaker
As a self-help guru, Robbins helps motivate people to become better leaders and achieve greater success. He says that the thing that changed his life was when he decided he wasn’t living up to his standard, so he changed his habits and way of thinking. His advice is to do an “Hour of Power ” every morning, which includes motivational sayings and visualization.

4. Matt Ouimet, president and CEO, Cedar Fair Entertainment Company
Ouimet was president of Disneyland Resort then Starwood Hotels & Resorts before becoming CEO of the North American amusement park company. Like many CEOs, he wakes up early to get a head start at work. He’s at the office by 6 a.m., when it’s quiet, to answer emails.

5. Craig Newmark, founder,Craigslist
The internet entrepreneur founded the classified advertisement website that has grown to service over 50 countries since 1995. According to a Fast Companyarticle, Newmark starts his day focusing on customer service and answering complaints, which he says anchors him to reality.
6. Obie Mackenzie, managing director, BlackRock
The award-winning business executive spends 84 minutes every morning chatting with his wife on their morning commute. He says, “It keeps us connected all day.”

7. Steve Reinemund, former Chairman and CEO, Pepsi
According to What the Most Successful People Do Before Breakfast , the now business school dean does a four mile run at 5 a.m. every morning, followed by prayer, reading the news and breakfast with his teenage kids.

8. Michelle Gass, president, Starbucks
For over 15 years, the coffee queen has woken up each morning at 4:30 a.m. to go running. She believes her morning routine has helped boost her happiness and business success .

9. Steve Jobs, late Apple CEO
Jobs spent his mornings re-evaluating his work and desires. In his speech to a graduating class at Stanford , Jobs said, “For the past 33 years I have looked in the mirror every morning and asked myself: ‘If today were the last day of my life, would I want to do what I am about to do today?’ And whenever the answer has been ‘No’ for too many days in a row, I know I need to change something.”

10. Jane Francisco, editor-in-chief, Chatelaine
Jane wakes up every morning at 6:30 a.m. and spends half an hour doing work before her son wakes up at 7 a.m. Between 7 a.m. and 7:30 a.m., she spends quality time with her son (cuddles in bed!) before getting him dressed and ready herself. By 8:30 a.m., she’s out the door for a 9 a.m. office start.

By Caroline Cakebread

Red Velvet Cake History

Often used as an alternative to the traditional birthday cake, the classic red velvet cake is a rich, layered dessert consisting of a mild chocolate flavor with a distinctive red color, and white frosting that both fills between the layers and covers the cake, usually made of cream cheese or butter cream.

The Mystery of the Red Velvet Cake Origin

The true origin of the Red Velvet Cake is a mystery. The earliest story or documentation involving this decadent chocolate cake was believed to be around 1959, when a woman dining at the elegant Waldorf-Astoria hotel in New York City was served the dessert. She was so pleased with this early Red Velvet Cake that she asked for the recipe. The kitchen obliged to her request, but she found out later she was charged $100 (or $200, depending on the version of the story) for the recipe itself.

To get her revenge on the NYC Hotel, she shared the kitchen’s Red Velvet Cake recipe in the form of chain letters, which she sent to hundreds of individuals, therefore exposing the “secret” and exploding the popularity of and demand for the Red Velvet Cake as a birthday cake and elegant dessert.

Although it’s possible that the first recipe for the Red Velvet Cake was created at the Waldorf Astoria, others believe that its story began at the bakery of the Eaton’s department store in Canada, even though the first Eaton’s documentation appeared in a 1961 newspaper announcing the “new” Red Velvet Cake, which would position Eaton’s as the second “founder” of this desired dessert.

Still others say that it is a U.S. Southern creation that grew into a tradition, spurring hundreds of bakers and dessert enthusiasts to dive into the recipe and adapt it to craft their own, custom-made version of the ruby colored cake to use as their own birthday cakes, or to be featured in their bakeries.

Today's Red Velvet Cake Popularity

 Regardless of where it first appeared, the Red Velvet Cake is suddenly all the rage. If they didn’t already offer it at one time, bakeries all over the United States are beginning to add this treat to their dessert and birthday cake menus, tweaking the original recipe to fit their own personal style, and attempting to keep up with the demand. In New York City, the Red Velvet Cake is threatening to take over the cheesecake’s place as the traditional city cake favorite.

February 29.... Wedding

I am so excited to be having a February wedding. I would like to have my wedding on 2/29/2012. I just love the idea of a winter wedding, with all of your wedding pictures including snow :)

 February is such a rare month for weddings/anniversaries/birthdays it's so awesome I love it! Also, i've heard the prices are lower, so why would anyone want to go for something cliché

Try something different from everyone else, that is my advice for everyone! I'm sure i'll be one of the only people who is getting married in February 29, just because it's a very original idea - but I just love Feb…. Sahsa Abdullah

Having a New Years Eve Wedding

Here are some ideas to make it as festive and memorable as possible!

There cannot be a more a romantic way to ring in a new year than with a celebration of marriage! We put together some ideas and tips to help plan your New Years Eve Wedding.
Attire:
Have your guests wear their most elegant attire by making it a special black tie event. The bride would look beautiful wearing a Long Satin Gown with shimmering sequins and a glittery tiara. The bridesmaids can wear long black velvet gowns and the groomsmen in all black tuxedos.

Flowers:

All red roses are an elegant choice for a black tie event, you can also mix in some white roses too.

Invitations:

Send out "save the date" cards as soon as you know the date, and send out your invites three months in advance instead of two just to give your guests plenty of time since it is a holiday.
For the invitation style, choose white and gold or white and silver. Also to make the wording special by adding a phrase like, "A new year, a new beginning" or "A countdown to the rest of our lives"

Favors:

Small bottles of champagne with personalized labels, chocolate covered fortune cookies with a new years fortune, a cd with your favorite hits from the past year with a personalized label, bells with a label that says "ring in the new year with your names", have someone take each guests instant photo as they arrive and place the photo in a personalized frame for them to take home with them when they leave.

Colors:

New years eve colors are typically black and silver or gold and silver.

Decorations:

To make a festive atmosphere, place noise makers , Party hats , candles, and confetti on the tables. Place balloons, white lights, and glittery snowflakes throughout. Place a large clock right behind the DJ to countdown, or have a large screen tv to watch the ball drop! Also, place balloons in netting over the dancefloor to drop down at the stroke of midnight.

Time:

Try to make it a late event, starting around 8:00pm. You want your guests to stay through the stroke of midnight to ring in the new year!

Food:

If you decide to serve a full meal, remind guests to have something light to eat before the event since they will be eating dinner later than usual(if your event starts at 8PM), but let them know you will be serving a full meal and to come hungry!

You may want to skip having a full meal and opt for hot appetizers offered throughout the night. You can serve hot wings, chicken/beef sticks, scallops and bacon, etc. Or, you can have stations set up so guests can help themselves.

Be sure to have plenty of coffee available throughout the night, or consider a coffee station when serving dessert.

These are just a few ideas to make your New Years Eve wedding special, but there are so many more possibilities to use your own creativity to add something unique to your special day.